Our reader, Grace, a 30-year-old woman, has recently confided in us with a deeply personal tale. Seeking guidance and perspective from our community, she finds herself in a delicate and urgent situation. It has come to her attention that her husband strongly opposes her use of menstrual pads during her periods, sparking significant turmoil in what was once a content household.
At 30, Grace has long believed her marriage to be the epitome of perfection. In her correspondence with us, she bared her soul, expressing her deep love and admiration for her husband, Paul, who has consistently been her unwavering support and a source of wisdom. However, recent events have shattered this ideal image. Grace shared the distressing situation unfolding in her family, where her husband’s sudden change in behavior has left her reeling in shock and desperation. Now, she turns to others for their perspectives and advice in navigating this tumultuous time.
Grace wrote, “Hi,
Now I’ve Seen Everything! I’ve never thought that I’d be facing such a tough and offensive situation in my own family, which I believed was a happy one. My husband Paul is 35, and he’s always been a very sensible and moderate person. Paul has a very serious job, he’s got a huge responsibility at work, and he has always been a model to follow for almost everyone who knows him. For me, he has always been a loving husband and a person whom I could trust and rely on.”
The woman added, “At least, I thought so, because one action of my husband to a seemingly normal thing has shattered my trust in him and killed my sense of respect for him forever.”
Grace disclosed, “I used to use tampons for my periods, and I have always believed that this was the most comfortable and the most convenient thing personally for me, but everything changed recently. I had some very serious health issues and I consulted my doctor about it. Due to these medical reasons, I couldn’t use tampons anymore and my doctors advised me to opt for sanitary pads instead.”
The woman shared, “Now I’m using pads, which isn’t that big of a deal for me. Of course, I didn’t get used to them, but this is still not a problem at all, and I would never make a huge issue out of it, but my husband has shockingly become a person who made a real stir about this seemingly innocent change.”
Grace revealed, “I had discussed my medical issues with Paul, and he appeared to be very empathetic and understanding. He reassured me, saying that we would face all health challenges together. However, I didn’t inform him about my decision to use pads moving forward. It didn’t occur to me that it would be something he needed to be informed about!”
The woman was taken aback when she discovered her husband’s reaction. She recounted, “When he noticed that I’m using pads, he instantly changed. At first, Paul complained about me not ’consulting’ him first. Then, to my deepest shock, he said that he doesn’t feel comfortable with me sleeping in bed wearing pads. He literally asked me to sleep somewhere else while I’m on my period, and this threw me off hard because I wasn’t expecting him to have an issue in that regard. He insisted that it just didn’t feel comfortable for him, and he actually thought menstrual pads were disgusting. He then added that he would like me to use tampons at nighttime or sleep somewhere else.”
Grace recounted, “When I heard this, I just laughed him off and kept sleeping on the bed while wearing my pads like there was no issue. But then, the things took a really unhealthy turn. My behavior made him so uncomfortable that he basically went to the couch, then started complaining from there about how I forced him on the couch by making him disgusted after he already suggested me some compromises. I told him that he was being a drama queen because his ’compromises’ were totally illogical, I couldn’t stop using pads and free bleed on the bed. I couldn’t risk my health and use tampons again when the doctors advised me against tampons.”
“Now, my husband remains upset with me even when I’m not on my period, insisting that I owe him for causing discomfort and disregarding his concerns. I’m getting angry, and I’m even thinking of asking him to move out, because our relationship has become very tense because of this. Am I overreacting to him being so rude? What would you do?”
What advice would you give to the author of this letter? Share your thoughts in the comments.
And in our other article, we told the story of a woman whose marriage was strained by a tampon when she found it in her husband’s car.
