During the latest episode of her The Oprah Podcast, the legendary talk show host opened up about her relationship with her late mom, Vernita Lee.
Oprah talked with Dr. Bruce Perry, a world-renowned child and adolescent psychiatrist and neuroscientist who she has known for decades, about childhood traumas and overcoming them.
At one point in the podcast, Oprah recalled a moment when she was asked to speak about her mom at a church while talking with a listener who asked how to forgive parents for not loving her the way she needed.
“I remember being asked to come to speak about my mother at a church,” Oprah began.
“And she was, you know, a very — not religious, (but) it was important for her to be seen as religious in the community. And I had become ‘Oprah Winfrey’ and everybody knew she was my mother.”
As she got emotional, Oprah said she was asked to come to the church “give all these accolades about my mother.”
“And I couldn’t think of one thing,” she said while listening to all of the other people tell endearing stories about their mothers.
She recalled one girl telling a story about how her mom made her special lunches, made sure her boots were always at the door if it was raining, and would also be hope to help her take them off.
But for Oprah, she couldn’t recall any loving exchanges between herself and her mom.
“I was like, ‘Oh my God,’ I don’t have one memory. I don’t have one single thing.”
When it came time for Oprah to speak, she dug deep thinking about what she actually has to be grateful for. “She didn’t abort me,” Oprah recalled.
Oprah said her mom “did the best that she knew. The best that she knew was not enough to feed what I need, was not enough to feel whole, was not enough to make me feel valued, or seen, or important to her. It was not, but was the best that she could do.”
Oprah said she ultimately “gave up the hope that it could have been anything other than what she had.”
In the comments, several of her followers felt seen my Oprah’s admission.
“Honoring the women who shaped us who to be and not to be, with grace,” one comment read.
“This just freed a lot of people,” said another.
Sadly so many of us were raised by parents who didn’t know love and care from their parents. Generational trauma can be healed and it can start with us,” a commenter wrote. “It starts with me in my family.”
